Saturday, October 1, 2011


I dunno what made me do it, but Dave went out to the market and I decided I was gonna shower, dammit. Maybe it was the fact that I woke up again last night, drenched in sweat (WHAT is causing this??). Maybe it was the fact that my hair hadn't been washed in 4 days (smarm-o-licious). Maybe I was just high from my tea-drinkin', yogurt-eatin' adventure at 5 a.m.? I went for it.

It was all going so well - still need to sponge-bathe because my drain incisions are not quite closed, so I did that, shaved the legs - at these tasks I am now a pro. It's not graceful or pretty, but between our trusty teak shower bench and the hand-held shower head thingy, I can get the job done.

But then I decided to get fancy.

I dried off my top, and suited up in my Shower Shirt - click on the hyperlink if you don't know what this thing is . . . basically a shortened, super-tight, waterproof windbreaker - complete with pink ribbon (ugh) that allows you to shower without getting your (upper-body) incisions wet. It's genius. I only wish I'd get more use out of it - but wait! don't get me wrong - I'm psyched to have my drains out so early.

Anyway. I get the shirt on, no problem, ratchet in the neck and away I go - bending over, washing MY OWN HAIR for the FIRST TIME IN WEEKS. Scrubbing my scalp, working up a lather, just like I like. I rinsed, and then I even conditioned. Oooh, I was feeling so good. Yes I can!!

I'm done, turn off the water, manage to wrap my hair up in my fav microfiber towel (faster drying for those of us with thick, long hair) and am feeling victorious. I'm tired, but still standing. Now I need to get the Shower Shirt off, dry off, get dressed, and probably take a nap. No problemo.

Oh, but there was a problemo - the zipper on the Shower Shirt broke. I'm alone. I'm struggling. I cannot get the damn thing unzipped. It's super tight - remember, this is supposed to keep water out . . . and between the the fact that someone has drunk the last 2 in my six-pack of abs and the tautness of the jacket, I'm straining to right the zipper.

I step out of the shower and yell hopefully, "Dave!!??" No answer. Not home yet. I briefly consider cutting the shower shirt off of my body with a pair of nail scissors. That seems tragic.

Finally, after much straining and a multitude of f-bombs, I got the zipper back on track and the shirt off. And then guess who gets home? Dave. He finds me red-faced, but triumphant.

Cheers to independence, however hard-fought! Now, time for that nap.




  1. Oh my, laughing out loud at this story. I am sure it wasn't funny for you at the time, but I am sure it will be later if not already! Congrats on your liberation from the Shower Shirt. Kind of Nemo moment??


  2. OK, so for those of us keeping score...

    Sarah: 2, Cancer: 0
    Sarah: 1, Shower Shirt: 0

    Sarah by the looks of if, you are just kickin' ass all around. Way to go.

    Enjoy your well earned nap.

    Take care,
    Debbie C.

  3. You guys are crackin' me up - Lindsay, it WAS so funny, that's why I had to post. If you can't laugh at this stuff, well, then, you might as well throw in the towel. And Debbie, thanks for keeping score for me - making me feel better already!

  4. Dear Sarah -- Time for a zipper pull, like they put on toddler jackets! I got the shoe repair guy to change my jacket zippers -- bigger is better! Try calendula spray for the night sweats. and at least you will smell better!


  5. LMAO!! Love the story and the posts. Isn't it nice to relearn all those things that seemed so easy before surgery? Jeepers!! And yes, I agree with Debbie - you are kicking ass all over! :-)
    (and I'm keeping the tip on calendula spray close by - gonna need all the help I can get in that area in a few short weeks! Let me know if it helps?)


  6. Cracking know where you are coming from! Relish every ounce of independence you can muster!

  7. HA HA HA HA HA - that would totally happen to me!
    I love it -
    and I know how it feels to do it all on your own.
    I am so happy to have some independence back - although Husband still doesn't want me in the house alone.

    I haven't braved the shaving yet - that's next.
    WAHOOOO to Healing and Normal cleanliness routines!